MY DAY: BETTER NOT BITTER SERIES V

The holiday season opens up windows and doors to do better. To ‘jump’ into something new. I am sure you will agree that people engage in an incalculable number of nonverbal communications, sighs, eye rolling, vision watching, sending innuendo messages, tweets that down grade. . . all passing judgment on petty things leaded down ‘bitter’ avenue.

The ‘battle for better’ is constant. The ability to stay in one place is one that is not open to us as human beings. I believe there is no such thing as standing still. Even when you are playing it safe, and think you are standing still, that game is called a myth. You are either moving forward or going backward. Going up or going down, because the present form of this world is passing away.

People will say all the time, “I know him” or “I know her”, when in essence it is a senseless and meaningless conversational point. The truth of the matter is, you are ever changing, ever evolving, ever developing, ever growing, ever reinventing. As you continue with the conversation, the reference point is further distorted because people are usually looking at a life from their vantage point. They tend to assert what they think based on a single marked moment or moments in your history.

A good example is a mother tells her daughter-in-law not to put onions in “Johnny’s” food because he hated them when he was growing up. Her reference point is based on his life from her vantage point as a mother raising a boy. Now “John” is 40 years old with a family of his own. His taste buds grew with him. You guessed it! Now, he loves onions cooked into his food. And that should be the end of the discussion.

I have grown to understand that ‘bitter’ people do not want to move on and since misery loves company, they prefer to keep you in their “as-the-bitter-world turns”. So, when you move on, the next voice you hear through the grapevine is “he sure has changed”. This is very important, one’s reference points for your life often do not leave room for your future evolution. Be aware. . if you evolve and redefine yourself, you just may lose a few acquaintances. Yesterday had limitations. Tomorrow holds opportunities. Today I opt to pursue my spiritual growth and amplify my personal development. Oh, yea.

How many people have found themselves dying on the vine. . . because they were afraid to ‘battle for better’, get that promotion, move to another country, step out on faith, get out of a messy relationship and stay out, attend a stage play, start dancing again? Just remember, if you do not find yourself getting ‘better’, you will be diagnosed with getting ‘bitter’, a long term disease.

Ester Davis can be reached at 214.376.9000. “Moving on”, ask me about ADI Engineering.