My Day: Obama & Carson Series

American President Barack  Obama and Dr. Ben Carson, the renowned surgeon, now Presidential hopeful, have something in common. They both had homework assignments from their parents. They were both raised in low income families with strict disciplines and agendas. However, this article is not about these two men. It is about today. . . parenting-in-America. . . and how we expect children to be. . . what they have not seen as an example in their homes.

I don’t have a polite opening for this subject, so I will get right to it.

The discipline of a child should start early. . . at home and MUST be consistent. Children are cute and precious, but only when they are disciplined and respectful. It is such an insult to a child’s development when you expect a teacher to ‘make-a-child-sit down’ when you, the parent has not set the example. Everyday I see blatant mistakes that parents make with young children. Let me give you a few small examples. A lady in the grocery store asked a “three year old” what he wanted to buy. When he made up his mind, the answer was ‘no’.

The child proceeded into a serious dramatic tantrum until she gave in. It is a real “bad sign” when a child ask for a ‘toy’ every time he goes to the store. The unforgiving harm is when he gets it. My favorite non-parenting action is telling a child to ‘comeon-let’s-go’, to-wit the child, replies, “wait-a-minute”. My third serious mistake parents make with young children is continual shouting when talking to him. Shouting. . . teaches a child that this is the way to communicate.

All of these actions are what I call, ‘writing a check you will never be able to cash”.

A few weeks ago, millions of parents made a visit to the beauty/barber shops, bought new school clothes, uniforms, drill team stuff, a list of school supplies, top-of-the-line cell phones, doubled-checked schedules and courses. Parents mapped out routes to new schools, some attended the orientations the first week. I heard a young parent say this week, “now I am done with school, I can start on Christmas shopping and my layaways”. Wrong! Wrong! Wrong! You cannot be done with school as a parent, as long as investors continue to build “homes” for low-performing (tested) children. Do indeed listen to me!

In President Obama’s book, “The Audacity of Hope” he shadows thoughts on reclaiming America’s values, echos from the house he was raised in. Ben Carson’s book, “One Nation”, sub-titled ‘what we can all do to save America’s future’, is clearly a signature documentary on how he was raised. Looking beyond the titles and the media ‘hype’ that now chaperone their every moves, it is important to remember that each of these two ‘presidential giants’ grew up in simple homes with powerful values.

And . . .these two men had ‘homework assignments’ from parents. Ben Carson’s mother could not read and write, but her mission was (with prayer) to make her sons read. Barack Obama’s mother was not illiterate, could read and write with the same focus in her household, under adverse circumstances, for her children.

It is not the ‘hoopla’ that America has placed in the path of childhood raising, it is simply consistent disciplines that is always in vogue. Please parents, teach your children at home. My question is — What is their homework assignment from you? Let me know.

Next week: The Common Thread That 80% of Inmates Have.

Final: Raising Our Boys to be Presidents —

Not Target Practice/Disrespect for Police

Ester Davis can be reached at 214.376.9000, or www.Esterday.com