Are You Raising One of the Next Generation of Hoodlums? Teachings about Love

February: the love month; the month that includes Valentine Day. And when we think of Valentine Day, our minds usually turn toward romantic love. Most adults can remember handing out Valentine cards to classmates and reserving a special one for their romantic interest, even as preadolescents when we were reluctant to reveal who the special person was. And, of course, as adolescents and later as adults, we chose cards with revealing messages to bestow upon our romantic interests.

Admittedly, romantic love impels us to action, but it’s not romantic love that will impel you to raise your son so that he passes from adolescence and emerges into adulthood as a man of character, a man who loves and honors those who love him.

David Miller, a former school teacher and a co-founder of the youth-focused Urban Leadership Institute in Baltimore, Maryland has developed an ambitious national campaign called Raising Him Alone. It is designed to help single mothers and their sons by providing a network of resources, advocacy and access to community-based services. Notably, numerous women in today’s society are in the process of attempting to raise their sons alone. And while the majority of these women had no intention of doing that, and no idea that it would become necessary, it has happened. Consequently, “Such support is critical,” says Miller, “because of the vast social implications tied to single parenting in America. For every mother who manages to raise a productive, successful son, there are countless others whose boys will fall through the cracks.” And this falling through the cracks will assist to produce the next generation of hoodlums, a generation of which you want to assure that your son is not a member.

A variety of statistics bear this out. But your son does not have to be numbered among these statistics. You can raise him is such a way that he begins to understand that it is a privilege to be loved, and that when he is loved, he should honor those who love him. One of the ways we do this is to teach compassion. It is important to encourage compassion in children. We must teach our sons to go beyond feeling sad for someone; we must teach them to act on their feelings by doing something for someone else.
Parents, teach compassion through your actions:

~Model compassion

~Act as a volunteer

~Give to a charity

~Read to your son examples from history of

compassionate people

~Assist your son to make cards or crafts for friends

and relatives who are shut in and/or hospitalized

~Perform acts of thoughtfulness and kindness

~Discipline with explanations: when your child misbehaves. Explain the problem and allow your son to think about how he would feel if that happened to him

~Encourage apologies and forgiveness
There are definitely things that parents can do to teach their sons about love. First and foremost, parents should love their children and demonstrate their love in the way they act toward them and interact with them.

Yes, February is the love month, the month that includes Valentine Day, and if you have a romantic interest, I’m sure you won’t neglect it. But during this month of love, please don’t neglect to focus on the love you have for your son. During this month, and during every month of the year, allow your love for him to propel you, especially during this month of love, to do what you need to do to provide your precious son the maximum chance to develop compassion! Yes, doing so will require some extra effort on your part, but loving your son sacrificially will require you to do some things that require extra effort. The question is, “ARE YOU WILLING?”

Special note: Readers are invited to tune in to Dr. Teal’s internet radio talk show. The link is www.kebnradio.com. 10 a.m. Saturday mornings CST.           You’re also invited to visit www.untealthen.com